Why your child needs you in their digital world

Today’s children are growing up surrounded by technology. Smartphones, tablets, gaming consoles and social media are now part of everyday life. While the digital world offers wonderful opportunities for learning, staying connected with friends and being creative, it also brings risks including cyberbullying, inappropriate content and online safety concerns. That’s why it’s so important for parents to know what their children are doing online and to set sensible limits on screen time.

Their digital world

Children are using digital devices from younger and younger ages, and spending more time online than ever before. By the age of 12, over 70% of children own smartphones, and many teenagers say they’re “almost always online”¹. Digital media is now deeply woven into how children learn, play and socialise.

However, unlimited or excessive screen time can push out important activities like physical exercise, face-to-face time with family and friends, sleep and homework². There are also online risks to consider, including inappropriate content, cyberbullying, contact from strangers and privacy issues. For some children, negative online experiences can contribute to social isolation and impact their mental health and wellbeing.

According to Sophie Sparks, teacher and Founder of You Can Sit With Me, charity dedicated to stopping bullying amongst children, “Effective school bullying prevention is built on everyday conversations — teaching digital responsibility every time a child accesses a device and building the foundation for lifelong safety and inclusion,” Sophie says.

Why Parents Need to Be Involved in Their Children’s Digital Lives

Parents play a vital role in keeping children safe online and helping them develop healthy digital habits. Research shows that children often don’t have the maturity or experience to fully understand online dangers or to manage their own screen time effectively^3.

“Bullying prevention genuinely starts at home,” Sophie continues. “When families lead with understanding and proactive engagement, they shape not just attitudes to digital safety but also the way children interact with their peers, respond to threats, and build resilience against cyberbullying. It’s about nurturing respect and responsible choices, both online and offline.”

Studies demonstrate that when parents are actively involved in their children’s digital lives, children are safer online and develop healthier habits^4.

Sophie shares: “When we talk about inclusive education and child inclusion strategies, it starts with honest and supportive communication at home. Families that foster this openness provide children with the confidence to share their feelings — especially when they’re uncertain or feeling vulnerable, whether it’s online, in their social circles, or at school. That supportive foundation multiplies the impact of anti-bullying campaigns and anti-bullying workshops, ensuring every young person feels noticed, valued and protected — across every classroom and community in Australia.”

Positive parental involvement includes:

Knowing What Children Are Doing Online

Many parents think they’re monitoring their children’s online activities more than they actually are. Whilst over 90% of parents say they monitor what their children do online, only about a third of children report having clear rules or guidance⁵. This gap suggests parents may need to be more hands-on than they realise. Effective monitoring is a key bullying prevention strategy that helps protect children from both experiencing and perpetrating harmful behaviours online.

Talking openly: Creating an atmosphere where children feel comfortable sharing their online experiences is crucial. Research indicates that children are often reluctant to tell parents about negative incidents, such as cyberbullying, because they worry about being punished or having devices taken away⁶. When parents build trust and keep communication open, children feel able to ask for help when they need it. This open dialogue provides essential cyberbullying support and bullying victim support when children need it most.

Setting a good example

Research consistently shows that children’s media habits are strongly influenced by how their parents use technology⁷. Parents who demonstrate balanced, mindful media use set a positive example for their children.

Teaching children about online risks

Parents should talk with their children about the complexities of social media and online interactions, helping them become critical thinkers who understand privacy and safety issues⁸. This bullying prevention education at home complements school-based anti-bullying programs and helps children develop the social skills they need to navigate digital spaces safely.

Why screen time limits are important

Alongside staying involved, setting sensible limits on screen time is essential as part of a proactive approach to child wellbeing. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and World Health Organisation (WHO) recommend limiting screen time for young children, for example, no more than one hour per day of high-quality content for children aged 2 to 5 years⁹. Many families find these guidelines challenging to follow, given how central technology is to modern life.

Setting limits helps to:

Protect important activities

Too much screen time can interfere with sleep, physical activity and face-to-face socialising, which are all crucial for healthy development and child mental health support^10.

Reduce exposure to harmful content

Restricting access to certain apps, games or websites can protect children from inappropriate material, cyberbullying and contact from strangers¹¹[Walsh, p. 24]. This is an important element of bullying prevention strategies that parents can implement at home.

Encourage balance and self-control

Clear rules help children learn to manage their own media use and develop healthier habits as they grow older¹². This supports social-emotional learning and helps reduce bullying behaviour.

Promote family time

Creating device-free zones or times (such as during meals or before bedtime) encourages quality family time and face-to-face conversation¹³. Strong family connections are protective factors that support student wellbeing and help prevent social isolation.

“Boundaries around technology aren’t meant to stifle a child’s development, they’re designed to carve out essential space for growth, meaningful connections, and real-world problem solving. Families who set gentle, consistent boundaries help children flourish as confident, resilient individuals,ready to face new challenges,” Sophie says.

Practical strategies for parents

Create rules together: Involving children in making family media plans encourages cooperation and helps tailor rules to individual needs and maturity levels¹⁴. For teenagers, flexible rules that gradually increase independence support healthy development. This collaborative approach mirrors the peer-led approaches used in effective anti-bullying programs.

Monitor and guide: Parents can use a combination of monitoring tools (such as parental controls and monitoring software) alongside active conversations about online content and behaviour¹⁵. This balanced approach provides both oversight and opportunities for bullying education.

Build digital literacy: Teaching children to think critically about digital media helps them navigate online risks independently¹⁶. Digital literacy is a form of bullying prevention education that empowers children to recognise and respond to harmful online behaviour.

Be mindful of your own device use: Parents should be aware of their own media habits, avoiding behaviours like “phubbing” (snubbing others in favour of phone use), which is linked to problematic media use in children¹⁷ . Modelling positive behaviour creates a positive school culture at home that supports child wellbeing.

Encourage digital breaks: Taking breaks from devices can improve concentration during homework or family activities¹⁸. Regular breaks support mental health and create opportunities for face-to-face social skills development.

Furthermore, the “You Can Sit With Me” peer-led program highlights the value of giving children simple tools to create inclusive peer networks and offer bullying victim support through everyday kindness and awareness.

Challenges parents face

Parents often struggle to keep up with rapidly changing technologies and platforms that may be unfamiliar to them. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to digital parenting, as families have different circumstances, cultures and needs. For some families, children may rely on digital media to access vital social support, particularly amongst marginalised young people]. Parents may also feel guilt or stress about managing screen time, especially when digital media is essential for education and staying connected^19.

Access to bullying support resources and evidence-informed resources can help parents navigate these challenges and implement effective strategies at home.

Sophie emphasises: “Every family faces unique circumstances and challenges when tackling bullying behaviour or supporting child wellbeing through school community building. By working together — parents, teachers, charities — we can create flexible bullying response programs and evidence-informed resources that meet children’s individual needs. When families and schools co-create anti-bullying campaigns, they empower every young person to rise above exclusion and thrive in truly inclusive environments.”

Importance of positive parenting

Research identifies three main parental approaches to children’s internet use: active (supervising and guiding), evaluative (teaching critical thinking) or restrictive (controlling and limiting). Positive outcomes tend to be associated with active and evaluative approaches rather than purely restrictive ones, which can sometimes backfire and increase risky behaviours^20.

Studies show that encouraging open dialogue, showing warmth and explaining reasons behind rules enhances children’s wellbeing and reduces the likelihood of cyberbullying involvement²¹. This positive approach supports youth empowerment and helps create a safe school environment both online and offline.

“Real empowerment happens in those moments when parents listen deeply, ask thoughtful questions, and guide rather than impose. Positive peer cultures emerge not from rigid control but from engaged, everyday leadership, in families and schools alike,” Sophie says.

Moving forward together

As digital devices become ever more embedded in children’s lives, parental involvement and thoughtful limits are more important than ever. Parents who stay informed, communicate openly, set a good example and establish consistent, age-appropriate boundaries empower their children to use digital media safely and positively.

Whilst challenges exist, including complex technology and diverse family circumstances, ongoing education and support for parents can help bridge these gaps. Connecting with school-based anti-bullying programs, attending anti-bullying workshops, and accessing bullying support resources can strengthen parents’ ability to support their children’s online safety and wellbeing.

Ultimately, parenting in the digital age is about balancing the risks and benefits of technology, building resilience and digital literacy, and nurturing strong, healthy family relationships. By working together with schools and communities to stop bullying and promote inclusive education, parents play a crucial role in creating safe environments where all children can thrive.

You Can Sit With Me has been recognised as a “Tier 1 Preventative Program” in the Australian Government’s Anti Bullying Rapid Review.

[1,2, 3, 7, 8, 9, 10,  12, 13, 14, 16, 17, 18, 19 ] Christakis, D. A., & Hale, L. (2025). Handbook of Children and Screens : Digital Media, Development, and Well-Being from Birth Through Adolescence (1st ed. 2025.). Springer Nature Switzerland.

[4, 5, 8, 11, 20, 21 ] Walsh, M. (Ed.). (2024). The Psychology of Cyberbullying. Nova Science Publishers.

[6] Kowalski, R. M., Limber, S. P., & Agatston, P. W. (2008). Cyber Bullying: Bullying in the Digital Age (1. Aufl.). Wiley-Blackwell.

[15] Chen, J., Huebner, E. S., & Tian, L. (2025). Relations Between Psychological Maltreatment by Teachers and Cyberbullying Perpetration Among Elementary School Students: The Roles of Self-Esteem and Sex. Child Maltreatment, 30(3), 422–433.

YOU CAN SIT WITH ME is an inclusive, evidence-based, peer-led program reducing school refusal, social isolation, bullying, exclusion and non-inclusive behaviour.

YOU CAN SIT WITH ME provides free programs for schools, sporting clubs and community groups.

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